The Megs vs No Sleep

Ever been so tired that everything is just absolutely hilarious??

I have. That’s what about 4 hours of sleep in a 48 hour period will do to you.  It’s great.


The last two nights, I was fortunate enough to work side by side with my shorter friend, which is always a recipe for laughter, meows, and lots of Epi.  These two nights were no exception.  However, around 6:30 am during our second Meg shift, the delusion set in like never before and soon the tears were flowing.  Tears of laughter; don’t worry.  Due to the earth-shattering rumbles coming from my stomach, (I’ve named the creature Otis) we decided to swing into the local Wawa on the way back from the hospital to calm the hungry beast.  


I can only imagine what the people in the store thought as they watched us walk aimlessly around, laughing at everything in sight, and then just stand in the middle of the store because we were too tired to make a decision on what to eat.  After about 37 minutes (ok it was probably only 2 but it felt like forever) and having 4 people offer to let us cut in front of them in line, despite the fact that we had nothing to buy yet, we decided on donuts.  Shocking, I know.  Since the stature of my smaller friend was more convenient to reach the donuts on the lower shelf, which are the ones we wanted, I let her be the one to collect them.  This is where I went wrong.


Now…..everyone knows that there’s that little box of wax paper squares that you’re supposed to use grab your donut or apple fritter so that you don’t contaminate the rest of the treats and spread your cooties to your fellow pastry-lovers.  So imagine my shock when I look down and watch my best friend and work partner reach her small little mitts into the cabinet and grab her chocolate donut all willy-nilly.  You filthy human… use the squares!  I don’t want your dirty paws all over my donut.  Now aware of and embarrassed by her blatant disregard for all of mankind, Small Meg reached into the box and removed one of those squares to collect my donut; vanilla iced with sprinkles.  Mmm.  She chose the perfect one for me, like only a best friend does, removed it from the cabinet with care, so as not to lose any of the precious sprinkles, licked the entire bottom of the donut, and threw it in the bag.  


She licked my donut. Licked it. Like this was socially acceptable. What kind of animal does that?? I’ll tell you who…


…this kind.

And all I could do was laugh hysterically. By the way, I ate the donut.  If I die, now everyone knows why. 

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​Completing the Foursome – Golfing with Strangers for the First Time

We usually start every conversation about golf the same way….and that’s explaining how terrible we are at it. So when we had to golf with two strangers this past week, we were nervous to say the least. 


We are normally on the receiving end of strange glances and double takes when we arrive for tee-time. Everyone always wants to know why 2 young, college aged girls are interested in golf. Our answer is always the same… why not? 
It’s the only sport where drinking is encouraged. I mean you have to walk through a bar to get to the playing field, which is almost always beautiful, and then a beer cart follows you around said course. To us, golf is a great excuse to enjoy the nice weather, drink, and have fun.  Shit, if you don’t feel like walking, you can just drive around in a cart instead! Golf is also a sport that’s known for it’s high level of difficulty, so it’s ok to play like shit. Which is why we always play strategically. Unfortunately, our strategy somewhat failed us this week. 


Mid week, around 2-3pm, has always been our ideal time to tee off. Our normal course is a local, well maintained, public course. The best part is that it’s public. This means that the rules and overall atmosphere of the course are a little more relaxed than those requiring memberships. It’s also significantly cheaper, and since we aren’t any good at all, this is a nice feature. Unfortunately everyone had the same idea this week, and it was crowded on the course. 

After gracefully arriving in our Uber, oh yeah we arrived well seasoned, we stumbled into the clubhouse and redeemed our rainchecks. Due to the crowded course, we were asked to make a foursome for the round and join 2 gentleman that were also ready to tee off. This was something we had feared since we started our unique hobby about a year and a half ago, but they seemed nice, had beer, and assured us that we wouldn’t hold them up. So we went with it. 

Now pretty well sauced from our clubhouse beers, we were playing like our BAC’s would suggest. Despite one of the worst rounds of golf we had ever played, it was hands down one of the most fun. The guys, John and Fran, ended up being very friendly and quite hilarious. We couldn’t help but laugh through the 14 holes we managed to struggle through. From some funny stories to playing barefoot to constantly poking fun at each other’s lack of skill, there wasn’t a dull moment for this foursome. Turns out playing with strangers can be quite entertaining!

Bisquickie the Pancake

​Have you ever been slapped in the face with a pancake? 

Of course the answer is no, right? What kind of question is that? Who would even do that to someone? 

……

I would.

Let me tell you a little story about the Megs and a giant pancake. Once upon a time, Tall Meg and Small Meg traveled to the magical land of Philadelphia, where contrary to popular belief it is not always sunny. On this particular day, it was cold and overcast, and the Megs went to cheer on Tall Meg’s brother in his first half marathon. After he finished the race, the entire Tall family and Small Meg went out for a celebratory breakfast. Can you guess yet what was on the menu? You got it; pancakes!! And let me tell you, they were delish! However they were also very filling, and Small Meg ended up with one entire pancake left that she just couldn’t finish. Rather than leave the poor fellow behind, we decided to take him with us. 

Now this didn’t go down the way you’re thinking, where the waitress comes back and asks if you’d like a box and then you package it up and put it in a bag and take it home with you. No no no. We paid the check and as we were all getting up from the table, Tall Meg grabbed the pancake off the plate and just carried it out of the restaurant. So now, here are the Megs, wandering the streets of Philadelphia just holding a giant pancake in their hand. Just another Meg day. 


Part 2, coming soon….